Reposting of Previous Post

I took down a post that talked about my excitement of being a father. Since we loss that child, I took down the post. My sweetie asked me to re-post it because it is about our journey.

Here it is.

Winds of Change by Doug
It has been awhile since I have updated my blog. I wanted to write that a lot has happened since I last wrote. In fact, very little has happen but that little is really big.
I found out that I am going to be a father. The feelings I had at the time were strange. I thought that I was suppose to jump up and down screaming, "Way to go boys! You did it!" I was so many things all at once it is hard to describe.
Being a father is something I always wanted and knew I would become some day. I never knew the date, time, year, century. Apparently, it start March 29, 2009. Who would have guessed that we would have a black president, camp would close its doors, and I would be a father. Two positives are pretty good.
Here is the deal: It scares me silly to think that I am going to be a father. My own father is nothing to really write about in this blog at this point. Let's just say that I appreciate his involvment in bringing me into this world. My one and only goal is to be the best possible father to this child. "Sprout" is in for a wild and crazy ride. I am sure that any man out there that has ever thought about be a father will want to be the best father. In reality, I want our child to look at me and say, "You done good Dad." Wow. "Dad." It is weird to write.
Big Daddy Doug.
Papa D.
The thought of someone looking at me like my Sweetie does makes my leg weak. There are a lot of changes coming down the road. There are things I need to change about myself, not because of the new addition to the family. I don't want to hang my decisions on that. It does influence my changes but it is not the reason. The reason is that it has be a long time coming.

Oh. The personal statement is just about finished and I want to send it off soon along with the rest of the application. I am leaning toward maybe a spring start. We will see. Thank you for reading and helping with the editing.

Peace and Love to my Sweetie and Sprout